What an awesome privilege it is to be called to be a wife.

If that is your title and position, may the Lord richly bless you.

There are so many scriptures in the Word of God that give us a wonderful

picture of how to accomplish this highly favored position.

You have heard the saying, “behind every good man there is a good woman”?

Yes…and the Lord designed it that way.  In Genesis 2:18, God said,

“It is not good that the man should be alone.  I will make a ‘help meet’ for him.” 

“Help meet” literally means ….a helper fit for him.  We have the awesome privilege to

be specifically designed by God to aid, support, encourage, and complete this man

that the Lord has chosen for us.

I would like to put this into a little different perspective possibly.

We as Christian ladies go to church or go to ladies meetings and are so gracious.

We would never think of snapping at a girlfriend, or being rude to them.

We go out of our way to do sweet little things for them and be ever so thoughtful of them.

We know the verses …….

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God,

for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (Ephes.4:32);  and  “With all lowliness and meekness,

with long-suffering, forbearing one another in love, endeavoring to keep

the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” (Ephes. 4:2,3)

But why do we take that kindness and sweetness off  when we walk into our homes?

What makes us think that we should be any different with our husbands, and

our children, for that matter?

Phil. 4:4 & 5 says, “Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say, Rejoice. 

Let your moderation be known unto all men.  The Lord is at hand.”

The word “moderation” means “sweet reasonableness”,  or literally…..

a giving loving kindness.

Why should this sweet, reasonable, giving loving kindness be exemplified in us

at all times, especially in our homes to our husbands?  Why?

Look at the verse…..because  “the Lord is at hand”.

The Lord is in our midst.  He is there to work in us and through us, if we are born-again believers

in Jesus Christ.  He will work to give us His sweetness, as we yield to His power and will in our lives.

The verse before Ephes. 4:2 says…”That ye walk worthy of the vocation to which ye are called”.

Phil. 2:1 -5 says…. “If there be, therefore,  any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love,

if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any tender mercies and compassions,

fulfill ye my joy, that ye be like minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind,

Let nothing be done through strife nor vainglory (selfishness, pride), but in lowliness of mind let each

esteem others better than themselves (this attitude allows us to defer to our husbands

and ultimately to the Lord),

Look not every man (woman) on his (her) own things,  but every man also on the things of others.

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus.”

So my Bible tells me that Christ Jesus himself had this lowliness of mind.  He deferred to His Heavenly Father

all the time when he was here on earth.  He had this same attitude toward His heavenly Father when he was here

that He is asking of us wives.

In Phil. 2:7 & 8 it says He …”made himself of no reputation, and took upon Him the form of a servant,

….and…He humbled Himself…”

OK…..so can I do any less?

Am I better than the Lord Jesus Christ?  And He will do it in me and through me,

as I ask him to, and yield to Him for His will in this.

If you are a wife, that is the first “vocation” to which you are called.

The verse in scripture that should bring this awesome privilege and task to the position

of importance in our lives is…..

Ephesians 5:33, “…..and the wife see that she reverence her husband”.


My encouragement to you is… to take that verse and run with it …as they say.

Find out what that word “reverence” means in the Greek,  and see how God really meant for us to “be”

with our husbands.  I am not talking about just what we do for them.

Being and doing for are two different things.

How and what are we to be with our husbands…..that is “the vocation to which we are called”.

I would like to give you just a glimpse of the meaning of the word “reverence.”

The word is translated to mean venerate, careful to give respect to,

to defer to, and fear (reverential trust).

Adam Clark’s commentary says…..” a Christian marriage has an excellence,

holiness, and unity in it, that cannot be easily described”.

He goes on to describe the marriage as a profound picture and

representation of the regenerated believers as the bride of Christ himself.

Here is a clip of his description of that relationship to each other.

‘The husband is to love his wife, the wife to obey and venerate her husband; love and protection on the one hand, affectionate subjection and fidelity on the other.  The husband should provide for his wife without encouraging profuseness;  encourage subjection in the fear of God; love her without jealousy; oblige her without flattery; honor her without making her proud; and be hers entirely, without becoming either her footman or her slave.  In short, they have equal rights and equal claims; but superior strength gives the man dominion, affection and subjection entitle the woman to love and protection.  Without the woman, man is but half a human being; in union with the man, the woman finds her safety and perfection.”

(We women are tempted greatly by the sin of materialism and coveting.)

We as wives sometimes cringe at the word “submit” in the verse…”Wives submit yourselves

unto your own husbands…”(Ehes. 5:22)

but the very next phrase should put that into a perspective that we honor and reverence.

“…as unto the Lord.”   Do we not reverence the Lord?

Do we not venerate and respect the Lord?

Are we not careful to defer to the Lord’s ways and not our own

when they are not the same, or seem to be in conflict?

Then why, if we love the Lord and want His blessing on our life,

do we even hesitate to not defer to our husbands, and reverence him

“as unto the Lord“?

I hesitate to answer that for us, because each of us is different,

 but I will make a few suggestions that I know

have had relevance in my life at times.

I Peter 5:5 & 6  says  “…Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility,

for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.  

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that he may

exalt you in due time.”

We as ladies believe this wholeheartedly …..

This is a verse that we practice in the very context in which it is written.

It is a passage that has to do with the church and how the believers conduct themselves

in relation to each other.

But why do we not practice this first and foremost in our marriages?

Do we not see that if we humble ourselves under the mighty hand of God that

He will exalt our marriages, and us in our marriages?

OK.. .granted!

This is not easy sometimes!!   You are right …we did not marry perfect men….!!

but, I submit to you that they did not marry a perfect women either!!

That is no excuse, because the very next verse here says…

“Casting all your care on Him (Christ), for He careth for you.”

We then get a warning to resist the devil (who would like to ruin our marriage).

And the next verse is wonderful, if you think you are suffering…..

“But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto His eternal glory by Christ Jesus,

after ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.”

My burden of soul and spirit here is to exalt Christian women and their marriages

by encouraging you to take in the scriptures…..

make them your foundation for your attitudes and actions….

ALL the scriptures, not just the ones we want to adhere to.  We have no right to pick and choose.

The Bible…..all the word of God…..  is our basis for FAITH and PRACTICE.

I have not mentioned this…..

but one day we will stand before God and give account ….

(II Cor. 10:5) “We must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ,

that everyone may receive

the things done in this body, according to that he hath done,

whether it be good or bad.”

We will either get a reward for the things done in this body,

or we will loose rewards for the things

that were done not according to the scriptures

….not according to God’s will for our lives.

The really great thing is that He stands ready to do His Word and will

in our lives, if we will yield to Him.

May we yield ourselves to God….(Rom. 6:19) …”yield your members

servants to righteousness, unto holiness.”

He says…”be ye holy, for I am holy ( I Peter 1:16).

My prayer is for you to know the will of God in your life, and do it.

God Bless You.


  Please see the section on “Where will I spend Eternity.

If you desire Holiness in your life, see the section on Holiness.

******Here I need to just make a statement that the nurse in me needs to express….******

There are times in this broken sinful world that it may be dangerous for a wife to stay

in an abusive relationship.

If you are in danger, or your children are in an abusive situation,

******* PLEASE….seek help. *******

Please do not stay where you are in danger.

Seek out a pastor for help.   Maybe you need to leave for a time.

Seek help and be safe.

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